i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
