That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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