i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
