just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
