Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I want to be your penis for a week.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
There's even glitter on my cock...
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