Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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