the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
