She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
