he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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