Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night