is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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