This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
