I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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