I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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