your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
