It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize