You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
