By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Panties = found
Randomize
