why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
