well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
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I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
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I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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