Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
