now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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