Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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