we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My breasts were aching with rage.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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