my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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