let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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