We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Randomize
