talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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