I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
