my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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