Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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