you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
