I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Apparently you make a good broom.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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