I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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