Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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