is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
