I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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