Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize