She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
