are you so shy because you have an std?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
