just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
