Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Terrible idea I love it
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
