is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Randomize