your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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