I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
