Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
worst night to have a conscience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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