I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
