"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
