so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
