finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
